The Hammer
| 8/18/2004 8:31 PM
Hello and welcome to my brand new myspace page. I started this page for one reason, and one reason only. To gloat, bitches! LOL! Seriously, these are good days we're living in. Republicans control the House and Senate, the Judicial and Executive branches. Our troops are in Iraq and ready to move on Iran and Syria. So let's enjoy these (End) Times and remember that all blessings flow from our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. And K Street! ROFL!
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Jack
| 8/20/2004 11:50 AM
First!
Hammer, what can I say? You're the best. I'll always remember your speech at that sweatshop manufacturing plant in the Marianas. And when you rolled in a birdie on 17 at St. Andrews...and watching the 'Skins play from my skybox.
Good times.
Thanks for all your work on behalf of American families, businesses and especially, Indian casinos. I look forward to many fruitful years together.
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Newt
| 8/28/2004 9:40 PM
I knew a guy like you once, Tom. Full of hubris and ready to change the world. Time Magazine's Man of the Year. Contract With America. And then it all came tumbling down. Just remember, my friend: don't get too cocky. Take it from someone who knows. The worm can turn at any time.
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The Hammer
| 8/29/2004 11:11 AM
Wise words, Newt. Except there's a difference between me and you. I carry a Hammer, you carried a feather.
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Newt
| 8/29/2004 3:11 PM
OK, we are definitely not friends anymore.
Asshat!
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Ralph
| 9/3/2004 9:13 AM
Tom, I had a vision last night. Jesus appeared to me and said I should do everything in my power to help our friends in the Choctaw tribe. Have you had any similar visions?
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The Hammer
| 9/3/2004 3:55 PM
As a matter of fact, I had the exact same one. As soon as the check cleared! LMAO!
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Kenron
| 9/21/2004 7:44 PM
How are you, Tom? It's been awhile. As you can imagine, these are difficult days for me and my family. Legal bills are mounting, and Linda has been forced to open a secondhand store to maintain our cash flow. Tom, if you could find it in your heart to make a donation to our legal defense fund, Linda and I would be eternally grateful. I'd ask you to remember all those generous checks I wrote to your campaign over the years. God bless. Ken.
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Kenron
| 11/13/2004 5:11 PM
Hello?
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Kenron
| 1/7/2005 3:31 PM
Bueller...?
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The Hammer
| 3/3/2005 1:17 PM
I want to ask you all to join me in sending out a prayer to a good friend of mine. Terri, hang in there, sweetheart. I 'll be damned if I let those bloodthirsty liberals pull the plug on you. You just keep that beautiful smile on your face, and we'll keep fighting for you.
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Terri
| 3/3/2005 8:14 AM
Does this look like a smile, a**hole?
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The Hammer
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9/14/2005 7:55 PM
By now you've probably heard about a certain candyass Democrat by the name of Ronnie Earle who has decided to bring charges against me. Of course I am innocent and look forward to clearing my good name. In the meantime, don't you all go worryin' about the Hammer. What I am going through is only a fraction of what Jesus Christ endured up on that cross.
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Jesus
| 9/15/2005 8:11 PM
Stop using my name. This is your last warning.
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Nick
| 10/21/2005 9:47 PM
Awesome mug shot, dude! I wish I had remembered to smile in mine. looooooooool!
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Jack
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1/4/2006 11:04 PM
Well, today was the plea agreement. Glad that's out of the way. I understand why you couldn't be there at the courthouse. Appearances, and all. I was wondering...what did you think of the black hat? Too much? My attorney thought it would convey an air of rabbinical authority.
p.s., why is W pretending he doesn't know me? |
The Hammer
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1/4/2006 8:15 AM
Um, Jack...
ix-nay on the essages-may. |
Jack
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1/5/2006 9:34 AM
You're turning your back on me too? I thought I was one of your closest and dearest friends.
OK, if that's how it's going to be, fine. But I won't be taking the fall alone. |
The Hammer
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1/5/2006 11:04 AM
Who are you? Do I know you? Please stop posting here! |
Hardball Chris
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1/24/2006 9:50 PM
Hammer, thanks for hosting us in Sugar Land. You rock! Hope you liked the piece we put together. Please know that when I said you're not in this business for the money, I wasn't being sarcastic. And thanks for the autographed photo! It's in my dressing room right next to my mirror. |
The Hammer
| 4/3/2006 8:11 PM
It is with great regret that I tell you I will not be seeking reelection to the House. The Hammer can handle the liberals and their smear campaign, but I have no desire to see my family dragged through the mud. To my many supporters, I say, thank you. And to my enemies, I say, f*ck you. This great country was built on rancorous partisanship and wanton corruption, and I will continue to practice those principles as long as I have a breath in my body.
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Bubba
| 4/4/2006 9:54 PM
Gee Hammer, do you think we should start clearing space for you up on Mount Rushmore? LOL!
Let me see if I got this straight. Your enemies, motivated by petty vindictiveness, launched a campaign to bring you down based on some trumped-up charges? All I can say to that is...
Woot!
Payback's a bitch, buddy.
Looks like it's back to killin' bugs for you.
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Katherine
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4/12/2006 12:04 PM
Hey Big Stud.
I know how it can be. Taking fire from your enemies. Abandoned by those fair weather friends (yes, that means you, Jeb).
You feel all...alone. You could use a friend. I'll be that friend. Call me. We'll talk. No big deal.
Or come out and see me in Longboat Key. I have a hot tub. I hear you like hot tubs.
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